the h word, 4/12/17

in third grade i was itching to age

and put my breasts in a training bra.

my mother and aunt joanie understood 

and carefully catered to my bumps.

who would i be without this female foundation?

no family man ever told me to follow my dreams

or fed faith in self.

there was little space for my voice in a room of brothers

  most used volume like a sword.  

my mother never shouted and i heard every word she spoke.

the idea of losing her sister

after losing her,

  annihilates me 

again.

at 95, there is not a wiser woman who knows my face

  yet it's been a year since I held her hand.

she is my mother's sister,

and i have forgotten to be my mother's daughter.
  
my own modern world fails.